I have become an expert at maintaining my relationship with my husband while I’m working to get my degree. Sure, it’s harder to fight about money when one of you works nights and the other drives almost daily a total of two hundred miles, but the key to maintaining a relationship with my husband while I drive and do homework for about half of my time ( half of what is left is in class!) is to let him know that I love him. I had to learn this lesson. At one point during my fourth semester, we began to feel as if we were in a “funk”. We had a new set of twins, I was taking eighteen credit hours, and he was working twelve hours a day, sometimes more. We’d gotten to the point where we barely spoke because we didn’t see each other much. I started to feel neglected, and knew that he probably felt the same. So from that day, I make the effort to kiss him hello, kiss him goodbye, and tell him how much he means to me. No matter how busy our lives are, we take the time to make sure the other knows that he/she is in our thoughts. It’s not always easy, though, sometimes it ends up just being a text.
So, I’ve never been particularly good at making friends, but for some reason, I’ve made and kept many college age friends. I think that Facebook is to blame for that. In a Shakespeare Comedies class (Pictured above), I met so many wonderful women. We acted out scenes from some of the bard’s comedies ( The Merry Wives of Windsor above). I learned that these young women and I have more in common than I thought we would. I also became a sort of “den mother”, I think that’s because I’m ten years older than many students. They came to me for advice and actually listened to me. It was an experience since my daughters rarely do so. I discovered that you can’t judge people just because they are a certain age. I thought I would be so beyond a group of twenty year olds that I might as well have been on the other side of the moon in comparison. I am glad to say that I was wrong. I am still friends with these young women and I hope to remain so.
Raising children is hard no matter when you do it. Doing it in college. . . it’s almost impossible. Almost. Raising my girls is the hardest endeavor I’ve ever taken on. They were born on August 31, 2011. Yes, just as school was starting. I was in my third semester, and I learned more from them than I ever had from any professor. They get into things when you aren’t looking, so you can’t use the bathroom until they’re taking a nap (see for example the featured picture). They break anything that you don’t have nailed down. They run around and get hurt. They wiggle their little ways right into your heart. I learned from the twinado that love knows no bounds. They can smear poo all over the bathroom wall and into the bathtub (and they have) but there is nothing that they can destroy that can stop me from adoring every inch of them. That was a tough lesson, especially when cleaning the poo.
So, we planed for the twins (one of them anyway). But Lillian came along two years and five days after Maddisun and Mackenzie. She was a surprise. From her, I’ve learned to expect surprises. She is just as destructive, just as gross and messy. However, I learned that sometimes, the most surprising of things can be the most amazing. So, because of her, I accept, even welcome the surprises that life hands me. Sometimes they are the cutest little ball of pink. . .
I haven’t always been the best student. In fact, I failed math twice and had to be put in a remedial math class. But what I’ve learned during my time in college is that My best is enough. I’ve always given everything to what I’m doing, and during my college experience, I’m seeing that my best is exactly good enough to get me through this. I know that I can apply this lesson to every aspect of my life: work, love, family. I think this is the most important lesson I’ve learned while in college. I learn from living, and even though I’m learning so much in college, my most important lessons come from “real” life.